It also became clear that when pain could be ascribed to an underlying dis- ease, such as cancer, it was accepted as real and treated with concern. The valida- tion of disease made the pain socially acceptable, not shunned by the health care system or by families and communities. However, when as a pediatric oncologist one of us also experienced chronic pain in a family member whose underlying disease was less well defined, the cultural perception of and response to the pain by the health care community was dramatically different. Reactions ranged from care and compassion to judgmental opinions that lacked compassion and some- times devolved into blaming or personalization of responsibility. The lack of a defined disease made the symptoms of pain and suffering less acceptable and more ascribed to overreaction, emotional instability, or worse. Because the pain could not be seen or measured “objectively” or interpreted within the context of the known, it was more likely to be dismissed, diminished, or avoided. The irony is that this pain and suffering, just like that of the patient with a known disease, could be life dominant—a disease in its own right.